Oh, please (a rant in F minor)
Toddlers diagnosed with bipolar
Because, you know, those two year-olds are really good at communicating all those subjective experiences so that you can determine whether it's bipolar, ADHD, giftedness, or any number of other things with similar and crossover traits. But hey, the money's in the bipolar, not the giftedness, so why not "be safe" and put them on meds that can really screw things up for them, right?
Our son is gifted. He could read kid's books on his own and do addition and subtraction well before he got out of diapers. He can also be extremely sensitive, perfectionist, not get along well with peers, get easily frustrated and take criticism and direction of any sort way too personally, live in his head, etc. So, when a psychiatrist saw him because he "wanted someone to talk to", which means that to see the therapist he needs to go through the med guy first, it's no wonder that his need to feel understood in the perhaps context of giftedness was not taken into consideration, but my bipolar diagnosis and things like ADHD were, because that's his thing.
Thing is, I know he's gifted. I do not know he's bipolar or ADD (he had nothing that could be taken as H whatsoever). In fact, his "quirks" can easily be explained by that we know, which is that's he's gifted. Bipolar or ADD didn't make sense. Still, the psychiatrist wanted to put him on an ADHD and antidepressant med, which we reluctantly did out of being hit with it unprepared, and out of an absolute refusal on my part to add mood stabilizers "just in case" he might be bipolar (good gawd). I/we basically said look, if for some reason he is, we know how to look out for the signs (which of course didn't exist, but could be triggered by the SSRI), but if we see no change, we're dropping the whole thing.
And we didn't, so we did.
He still got to see the therapist, who he liked, but eventually pushed too much to make it a family affair while not giving a one good reason why. All I could tell was that he was just conversing one on one, enjoying the uninterrupted time to share all the things he thinks about, a bit of a respite from struggling like he always has to fit in to a world where his giftedness makes him different and misunderstood.
With her and the doc, giftedness was not on their radar as an explanation for anything. His best outlet for that is, and continues to be, placement in a gifted program. The teacher gets it, and his peers are like him, instead of thinking he's weird for always thinking and being philosophical and trying to solve all the mysteries of the universe and absorbing knowledge with glee. I also ramble, and talk conceptually a lot, and he soaks that stuff up like crazy. It makes him feel understood and a connection on a different level.
Therapist did not get it. Doc only knows how to prescribe things as an answer for anything, and doesn't know how to say, "you don't need this". I'll let the world know when I come across a psychiatrist who comes across a person and says they dosn't need meds. Until then, after my vast experience with all two of them, they can all flip off.
Bipolar toddlers. Give me a break.
for the NNAF
5 comments:
First of all, I'm so glad that you are who you are and you stuck up for your son.
I'm so mad I could spit blood. Bipolar toddlers and young children? Sure that's just what we need, make kids go through the medicine merry-go-round that adults go through.
Now, I'm all for keeping an eye out. Mental disorders go undiagnosed all the time. I desperately needed treatment as a kid, but I was in high school! I went without treatment until my late 20s. Things might have been different for me if I'd gotten help when I first needed it.
But toddlers? As you said-they're so good at discussing symptoms, aren't they? And gifted children-why do docs have to be so one-dimensional? It must be bipolar. Why, because the kid is smarter than you, doctor? Hmmm, threatened?
Sorry, it's just so ridiculous. I'm willing to take whatever med I need, because the alternative is unbearable. But loading children up with heavy-duty drugs is unconscionable. It's trendy now to diagnose anyone and everything. Who cares if you sacrifice the people who didn't need the medication. Who cares if you trivialize the real illnesses by saying that everyone has them?
Thank heavens you educated yourself on this subject and didn't let the "experts" talk you into anything. I got put on anti-depressants (tricyclics no less) when I was eight, mostly because I told the counselor that sometimes I wished I'd never been born, an understandable response from a girl whose stepmother never refrained from belittling her when she was angry and who'd suffered neglect at the hands of her alcoholic father before the marriage, (though to give the guy credit, I didn't tell anyone about the last bit until I was 14). Also I'd written a note to them that said I was going to sleep for a week, which they seemed to take as a suicide threat...although I thought I was going to take a really long nap. My parents also seemed to be convinced I had ADD as well, which eventually led to me taking Adderall for two years...although my original diagnosis says specifically that I don't have ADD. So I spent my whole childhood believing I had mental disorders I didn't have. Spiffy, no?
It's so comforting when the rage is shared. :)
I am not against medications when necessary and effective, but on a personal level I have a big problem with them because of my experiences. Mental illness is not something you can take a test for to confirm its existence. It's so full of trial and error guessing and subjective observations it's hardly a science. It is not something I think one should provide questionable, poorly tested, marginally more effective than placebo, nasty side-effect drenched psychotropic drugs for "just in case". You better be damned sure as far as I'm concerned, and in order to be damned sure, you hand over knowledge before you hand over a prescription.
Thank you for sharing my rage. It is both good to know it's shared, and of course it sucks to know it's shared.
Bipolar toddlers? What the hell do they think they're doing?! The ease with which doctors will hand out psychotropic drugs without any real consideration of the consequences has always disgusted me, but to give it to toddlers? What the fuck is wrong with these people?!
I know first hand the damage that psychotropic meds can do when wrongly prescribed to an adult, so god only knows what could happen to a child.
You better be damned sure as far as I'm concerned, and in order to be damned sure, you hand over knowledge before you hand over a prescription.
EXACTLY! I remember being told roughly fuck-all about the meds I was given, and I honestly don't think the doctor knew entirely what he was doing either.
The terrible thing is that doctors are in a position of trust, and the majority of patients, or parents of patients, don't know about antipsych meds (nor is there any reason they should). So they have to assume that the doctor knows what s/he is doing. If they are skeptical they may be accused of neglect of their children, or if an adult, of being sick precisely becauses they refuse the treatment offered.
Treatment for mental health should be so much better. If only doctors weren't convinced taht everything can be solved with a fucking pill, and that keeping someone quiet isn't the same as curing them.
Sorry, rant over. This is one of the major chips on my shoulder!
I realized I forgot to add one thing to my above comment. I do believe that that doctor prescribed me meds despite knowing that I didn't have clinical depression, because I was depressed (although it was simply as a result of circumstances, as it has often been in my life.) And since he knew my situation, he knew that it wasn't going to get better until I got out and that I needed to be alive for that to happen, and though I wasn't suicidal at 8, I didn't understand what it was...but after I did, it didn't seem like such a bad idea sometimes. So in truth, I don't hate him for that...now I'm just confused a lot of the time because I realize there's nothing really wrong with me and I forget and sometimes still think there is.
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